Cold Nostalgia

Friday, May 7, 2010 @ 4:35 PM

happened to chance upon this guy.. nick vujicic.. after watching his video on youtube, i cant help but want to give him a tight hug. for a guy without hands nor legs, and yet can be so optimistic about life. honestly, i feel so ashamed by myself.

in the video he said, " people always think about what they want and what they dont have, they never think about what they really have." so now my turn to ask myself.. " what do i really have?" A family, my baby, a shelter, basic necessities, etc.. then why am i asking for so much in life?

the best answer for that is simply greed. everyone has greed somewhere in their dna, its just a matter of material, emotional, physical etc.. for me its emotional. why? maybe cuz i felt that all my life i was alone, that i had no one to depend on.. and once i did, i was hurt. something along that line i guess.. thats why i think i suffer from some emotional imbalance where i want to depend yet afraid to get hurt. i mean you cant have it both ways, either you do or you dont.. choice is yours.

had a chat with my collegue today and she enlighten me. haha.. i told her if i were to marry a man.. i will make sure that he will be there during the whole 9 mths of my pregnancy and will wake up in the middle of the night and satisfy my cravings. haha.. she laughed and said, " you think you are in some dreamland? this is reality, there is no guy in this world who will do that unless he loves you alot alot alot.. and usually these guys are rare and extinct." after hearing that i started to think am i still in the fairytale relationship, looking for romance? according to her younger generations like me look for romance, while older guys tend to focus more on work.. she told me that to guys who are older, they dont have the time or feel there is a need to msg or call everyday. its not like you have a million and one things to say to each other.. true but still.. if they dont call you in the

beginning of the rs wont you think that they dont love you?

i guess generation is important and the age gap between you and your SO cant be too drastic or else there is generation gap. and if there is i guess both party have to do their part. the younger one has to be more matured whereby the older one has to have more patience and explaining and letting the younger one understand what is right and wrong and why are things the way they are. if in the beginning of a relationship, both party cant understand each other, how the hell will it last..